We’ve all wondered about certain exes- where they are, what they’re up to – but would you use technology to keep tabs on them?
Is it cyber-snooping or just or just a healthy curiosity? A legal love-hunt or the beginning of a stalking addiction?
Read an article of a writer who talk to most people and according to her, they’ll admit to having Google an ex or two.

IN THE BEGINNING
You know how it is; you’re wondering how and where they are and suddenly you’re trawling through 80 pages of namesakes- IT specialists, basketball players and some university professor who’s just written a paper on a coldsore cure.
Never a quitter, you plough on and before you know it, you’re singed up as a fully fledged cyber-stalker.

CYBER SLEUTH
So, why is it so irresistible? Ideally it’s a low-risk, civilized way of sleuthing someone without them knowing about it.
It’s more challenging than Friends Reunited, but no investment is needed in terms of contact.
On the darker side, we run the risk of discovering (if we still care) that out erstwhile lovers’ lives didn’t stop when we/they kicked them/us out.

NO NEWS IS GOOD NEWS
Googling barely confirms someone’s existence. So what if we draw an absolute blank?
Some said it’s always quite satisfying when you don’t actually find anything. Others gone online a few times to look up a particular lowlife who adid the dirty on them and then finding nothing on them sort of confirming to herself that no what a no-mark loser the other party was.

HIT AND MISS
Which implies there’s some sort of kudos attached to a Google hit.
Not always so.
According to a 29 years old woman, “I googled my ex and found a story from a local paper about him being convicted for drug offenses and burglary, which was sad, but not exactly a surprise.”
Googling “the one who got away” can become dangerous, especially if it becomes an obsession.
It’s one thing to find out, say, that he’s recently been on a charity trek to India or to look up his holiday snaps.
It’s quite another if you start Googling him daily.

FATAL ATTRACTION
A computer-savvy marketing manager is ashamed to say she’s gone even further.
“I found myself digging up information on a gorgeous bloke I had a torrid fling with and his girlfriend. I discovered photos of her and became obsessed. Then I figured out a way of deleting the pictures from the website.”
But be careful – what seems like an innocent search might open a painful can of worms if unreconciled feelings still lurk.
Another girl got a shock when she was Googled by her first true love.
“We’d been together for a few years when I was 16, but it all ended when he two-timed me with my best-friend.
“I moved away and started running a business.
“He tracked me down last year via my website and we met. He said the day day I dumped him was the worst day of his life. It blew my mind, but we’re both married with kids and it’s in the past.”

BLOG OFF
And what of the boom in blogging, where people choose to lay bare their innermost workings for public consumption?
For a guy, who was 30, it was a case of too much information.
“I googled my (now) ex-girlfriend when were still together. She had a blog and to my horror was talking about what a jerk I was and how she banging on about how good the sex with the other person,” a guy said.
It all goes to show that, when we Google, we might find out a few things we didn’t bargain for.
Let’s face it, there’s nothing wrong with casually looking up on an old flame to see what’s happened to them.
But if you’re still feeling bitter, sad or obsessed, you could develop an e-stalking habit what’s hard to break.
In which case: switch off that machine, build a bridge and just get over it.

This entry was posted on Monday, August 31st, 2009 at 8:35 pm and is filed under computers and internet, lovehurts, romance and relationship. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.